A Near Cat-astrophe

Sunday night, 8 pm: I get done eating dinner with my family and decide to check my voicemail. Bad news: Fudgems has gotten out of the apartment and is on the run. I immediately call Becky back to get the scoop. Turns out that Fudgems bolted out the door (he can bolt, apparently), trotted around the yard for a bit, and then took off; a neighbor says he saw him run across the main road. I immediately start crying at the prospect of stupid crazy Fudgems out in the world...surely there is no way he can make it back home.

9:30 pm: I make it back to the apartment. The place is lit up like a Christmas tree, all the windows and doors open, Friskies everywhere. Good thinking. If anything will bring Fudgems back, it's Friskies. Becky has looked and looked, but there's no sign of him anywhere. We remember that it's supposed to start storming on Monday or Tuesday. This is not good news. Storms will ruin both our fliers and our cat's fragile psyche: he's afraid of thunder. The clock is ticking. We put a box out on the front porch with a towel in it. A nap and Friskies! How can he resist?

10:30 pm: He resists. Becky gives up and goes to bed. I continue sitting on the couch/peering out the window for over an hour. Various people offer me tips and support over IM, up to and including an offer of a slightly smaller replacement Fudgems.

11:50 pm: I hear something bump against the back screen door. I get up and go into the kitchen, and what do I see through the door? Fudgems! He found the Friskies on the patio! Unfortunately, he sees me too and freaks out. He swerves toward the patio gate, then changes his mind and books it under the fence. This is an odd and un-Fudgems-like move. He looks stealthy...svelte, even. Has six hours on the streets changed him already? I'm trying to pry the stick out of the door and get the handle unlocked, but he's gone. I go outside and call him, shake the food...nothing. I put my shoes on and go out into the yard with a flashlight, but it's like he was never there. I don't want to go inside with him so close, but there's nothing else I can do. I feel slightly better that at least he knows where he lives. Maybe we'll get him after all.

12:15 am: Bed.

1:00 am: Just as I'm drifting off to sleep I'm awakened by horrible cat-yowling outside the window, and several houses away a dog starts barking frantically. I know it's Fudgems, but he's too far away. I have to lie down and go back to sleep.

4:45 am: The same cat-yowling, but much closer this time. I sit up and put my face to the window, and see Fudgems down on the patio. He is getting wailed on by...himself? There are two Fudgemses down there, locked in battle. I call his name through the window, and the Fudgems doppelganger freezes, looks up at me, then takes off under the fence. It's the cat from before! Regular Fudgems makes a beeline for the sliding door; the racket woke up Becky too, and she's already down there to let him in. By the time I get out of my room, Fudgems is trotting up the stairs for a pat. Becky and I wonder for a second if we let the wrong cat in--maybe Fudgems got away, and this is the evil twin. Luckily we're interrupted by the familiar sound of Fudgems heaving himself up on the dresser and planting his face in his bowl of food. Yep, that's him. He's back.

Monday, 2:09 pm: Stupid, fat, bipolar, clumsy, grouchy, awesome Fudgems is sitting at the bottom of the stairs, licking his business. Everything is back to normal.

I want I want I want

-I want to learn to draw
-I want to wear outrageous things
-I want to take pictures that will make other people's stomachs get all twisty and jealous
-I want to feel accomplished at the end of the day
-I want to read more
-I want to clean this place up
-I want to get up and go

Just for the record.

Keeneland blog coming soon, I promise. I know you're on the edge of your freaking seat.

Long lines can be taxing

I finally mailed my federal tax stuff in today. Yes, on the last possible day. Believe it or not, I usually do get that stuff in earlier, but this year I had kind of started it and then forgot about it. In any case, I drove over to the post office thinking that it would be pretty quick to drop it in the mail. I didn't have any stamps, but I figured I would just buy one from the vending machine, no problem. Well, the stupid single stamp part of the machine was sold out. Sold out! On tax day. Do they not realize that a shit-ton of people are going to be coming in needing a stamp today? That is ridiculous. I finally decided that I would just suck it up and buy a whole book of stamps, even though I almost never use them. I soon realized, however, that the stupid machine gives you dollar coins as change, and I only had a 20 on me. I do not want 12 stupid dollar coins in my wallet, and I do not want to have to spend the next two weeks explaining what a dollar coin is every time I try to buy something..."No, really, it's a real coin. It's a dollar. No, I know it kind of looks like a quarter, but I promise you, it's a dollar. Like, a regular dollar. No, no, you don't need to call your supervisor over..." God. So I got in line, like a chump. I think I was the only person there mailing their tax stuff, but the line was hella long. Everyone had packages. Maybe you don't mail your package on tax day, ok? It's kind of a big day for the post office. It's gonna be busy. Wait till tomorrow.

Personally, I prefer Nacho Cheese Pretzel

Am I wasting my life? I did absolutely nothing today other than go to work and sit around. This blog entry is a check in the productivity column, even though writing in my stupid blog is pretty damn unproductive itself.

Well. As is tradition for me, I got CDs in my Easter basket (yes, I still get an Easter basket). I got Amy Winehouse (Back to Black), The Fratellis (Costello Music), and Mika (Life in Cartoon Motion). So far I have only really listened to the Mika CD, and it is great! Seriously, check it out. I was afraid that it would be too fluffy and silly, but then I listened to it and realized that there's no such thing. "Lollipop" in particular is like the trippiest, dumbest, best song I've heard in forever, and I've listened to "Any Other World" about a million times already.

Speaking of music...first off, if I have any CDs that you think you might be interested in, just let me know and I will gladly hook you up. I know I've told a bunch of people recently "Oh, I have that!" but I know I'll forget to lend/burn them for you if I'm not reminded. Secondly, it would be awesome if everyone who reads this would rec me one song/album/artist that you haven't heard me talk about but think I would like. Just ONE. C'mon, there have to be like three to five people reading this...I know you have it in you!

Ok, I had other things to say but I'll save them for later, because these entries always get sooo long anyway. But I did want to mention one thing: The number of people coming into the library who smell like pepperoni pizza Combos is troubling. I just had to get that off my chest.

Hip to Stitch

Ok, I have a new imaginary hobby! You know, like those other million hobbies I've had that I talk about and read about but never actually pick up...remember origami, and quilting, and making funny t-shirts, etc etc etc? Well today's fake hobby of the day is: embroidery! Yay! I am so looking forward to not embroidering things! But no, seriously, I think I might actually do it, at least for a little bit. For one thing, it seems pretty easy. Also, it's versatile--I can do clothes or things for around the house like pillows or towels or whatever. I can also be creative and come up with my own designs. Finally, I actually have all the stuff I need. I have a shit-ton of embroidery floss (from an old imaginary hobby of making friendship bracelets), and my mom gave me the proper needles and a hoop. I'm going to try to look at some books and see if I can get into it. I think embroidered stuff is so cute. Maybe this hobby will actually stick. Here's hoping.

I would also like to take this opportunity to officially register my displeasure in missing both the David Sedaris and Ben Folds appearances that are coming up soon. Sedaris is coming to Springfield on the 9th (I think) and Ben Folds is playing OWU's Springfest on the 14th. Technically I could go to both of these things, but a combination of feeling like I don't have anyone who wants to go plus feeling like I shouldn't spend the money is keeping me home. I feel like missing these events are the kinds of things that I will regret in the future...and yet, here I am, not going. Grr. I kind of wish I hadn't heard about them at all, because then I wouldn't have to feel bummed about missing them.