Thoughtses

I am feeling very crazy right now, and I'm not sure why. Let's try and sort it out.

1.) I have a lot of little things to do. I got a bunch of them done today (bank, bills, library, video store, laundry, etc) but there are many left. I made a list, which helps a little in feeling organized but also makes things worse because it makes it real how many things are on there. My possible case of ADD or whatever the hell else is wrong with my brain makes it extremely hard for me to any kind of "plan of attack" or to actually get these little things done. But I'm making progress. That's something.

2.) I am possibly having car trouble and am not sure when I will be getting it fixed. This is stressing me out A LOT because I am kind of stuck up here on my own if my car won't start...I can't get a ride to work or anything. I need to realize first of all that if my car won't start and I can't get to work, it's not the end of the world. Stuff like that happens to people all the time. But I feel really really bad about that kind of thing, which is why I have yet to ever call in sick to work or anything like that, even if I really don't feel like going. As lazy and irresponsible as I am, I feel guilty enough about missing one day of work (a 4 hour day, at that) for it to completely ruin my day. I remember the one day I couldn't go in after I broke my arm I just about blew my brains out. In any case, hopefully the car will be a-ok until I can get it fixed and then this will just all be a moot point.

3.) ...I can't think of anything else. Is that really all? Lord, I need therapy then. One thing that's bothering me is that I have a bad headache, and I think in my brain I'm associating that headache with stress and therefore assuming that I have a LOT on my mind, when in fact I'm pretty sure the headache is just leftover sinus crap from last week's cold.

On a more positive note, I had a fun weekend. I guess I didn't actually "do" anything, but it was sunny and gorgeous, I didn't have to work, I had fun hanging out with people, etc. I had, in fact, just been thinking that my life is really good right now. Haha, thanks for such a great Monday, universe. Suck it. Anyway, I am generally pretty happy these days and have many of the things in my life that I didn't have for a while. Additionally, I'm looking forward to spring and summer. I have some goals:

• Get outside more. The sun can be a pain in the ass but too bad.
• Do more actual activities and less sitting around.
• Eat more ice cream (always).
• Enjoy life. Kind of vague, but hey. I felt like putting it.

I hope that people don't hate me for writing long, boring shit like this. Sorry, but that's the kind of blog this is going to be, probably. In fact, if you are reading this, I wish that YOU would write me absurdly long-winded emails on a regular basis. That's one thing I miss. Back in my email heyday I could knock out a four page email every day, and getting them in return was just as good or better. So if you're ever bored or feel like blathering on and on about nothing, don't think for a second that I wouldn't love to read it. Hit me up!